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Man Law #58 – A.B.D.S.E – Always Be Doing Something Else…
Few women will admit that they find men who they know will wait on them hand and foot to be EXTREMELY unattractive. Women have a special term that they throw around in their inner social circles for these types of guys , they call them “puppy dogs“.
Don’t laugh.
STAY FOCUSED....This may look like a simple game of beer pong..It's not... Woman love to lead you astray while you are hoping to score. Look for other situations where you find this happening...
Because chances are, you’ve been called one before; I know that I have.
Here is what often happens and gentlemen, we’ve all been there before, so don’t feel bad. Here is the situation -you are young, a tad bit experienced with women (or at least you think you are), going out all the time, having fun, you are inviting girls out left and right to have a good time…You finally go home with one attractive girl and have an amazing night….and what happens?
You are all over her…
Calling when you are supposed to, doing everything every woman has told you that you need to do…and yet…
She’s not interested.
Why?
Because women dislike that which comes easily to them…
Now working a one-night stand into something sustainable is another skill altogether, however, at the time, take it for what its worth. A One-Night Stand ends with that night. Chances are, both of you were drunk at the time and if you are not careful, she will easily regret sleeping with you, if you are all over her the day afterwards.
I didn’t realize this until mid-way through college that the girls I payed MORE attention to, that I called on a regular basis, that I went out of my way to say hello to, were the girls, I NEVER got… I just could not figure it out. I was doing everything that other women SAID they wanted…and yet…nada.
That was until I learned…A.B.D.S.E. – Always Be Doing Something Else.
While I only learned this acronym recently, I learned the rule long ago. So simple, yet it was like a light switch had turned on. It was the guy who was actively involved with sports, lacrosse, music, baseball, whatever, the guy who was always doing something else he was passionate about, that women always found attractive… After I realized what was really happening, I got back involved. It was almost as if I had realized that I needed to stay active as a part of my past, then met a girl I thought I liked, stopped all of these things to focus on her, and then lost it all…
The first thing that should strike you right now if you are over 18 is..."JAIL BAIT". Just ignore these types of girls...overly sexualized and playing to our basic instincts as men.
Women are exceptional seducers. They will take an All-Star Quarterback and make him a whining little boy which she likes, but doesn’t respect. I realized that when I was involved with other activities, pursuing goals, declining invites to go out, that I was actually doing BETTER with women. In fact, the more that I pushed them away, the more they wanted to go out with me… It just didn’t make any sense…
Gentlemen, just about every woman that you know has gone home (or hooked up) with a guy that she would NEVER have thought she would have…These are the guys that break every idealistic characteristic that she wrote down in her diary. They like tall men and he’s short…They like well-educated lawyers and he dropped out of high school. Women constantly find themselves rationalizing why they went home with a guy that shatters every standard that they thought they had…
It is for this very reason that you need to Always Be Doing Something Else. Stay Active and Stay Focused. It is SO easy to become entranced with a woman who shows the slightest bit of interest in you, whether its a kiss on the cheek or she goes home with you that night. You need to act like nothing happened and keep on swimming…
Man Law #57 – Compliment Her, Not the Genetics!
The compliment is one of the least understood and seldom perfected points of courtship. If you are in a social situation (i.e. that’s bar or party for those of you just joining us) and you meet someone new that you may be interested in dating, do NOT compliment ANYTHING physical about her appearance. Read this again, do NOT compliment ANYTHING physical about her appearance.
DANGER! DANGER! Both girls KNOW what you are looking at...Be sure to compliment her CHOICE in NECKLACES (Did you even notice?) and don't look down...
When I say physical, I am speaking about her body. Even though she may have size 34DDs, do not be the 334th guy to say that about her that month… Now, few men (I hope) reading this would be that out of touch to do something like that… Women are aware of the fact that men are very visual creatures. They use that to their advantage. Do not compliment them on that which will draw immediate and obvious attention. What was the first thing that you noticed in the picture on the right?
Yeah…
Her genetics are something that is completely the luck of the draw. So even though she may have been born looking like a Victoria Secret model, she had absolutely nothing to do about that and thus, she knows that you are only giving her a compliment based on her PHYSICAL appearance – An appearance that she knows does not represent how she always looks. You haven’t seen her on a bad hair day or without make up on…
As a fundamental rule of thumb, compliments should ALWAYS be given WITH sincerity. If you don’t mean it…Don’t say it. Although science has not proven this yet, I am convinced that women have an 8th sense (in addition to the five already known) that allows them to see past BS.
Think of the art of giving compliments like the cherry in a daiquiri. They should ADD to an already pleasant experience, however, for maximum effect, you need to use them sparingly. Being overly complimentary of a woman will be a fast way to the friend zone. This will decrease your value and while she may feel good/great around you, she KNOWS that you do not know the true her. You haven’t seen her on a bad hair day or without her make up on and you certainly haven’t seen her the morning after…
To ensure that your compliment is sincere, you should almost have an involuntary reason for giving it. Something that almost springs from inside of you that has to find its way out. The compliment needs to be authentic.
The BEST way to give a compliment is to compliment a choice or decision that she has made. You want to compliment her way of thinking that makes her unique and different from the hundred other women who may be at the bar, party, train station (hey, you never know) that night…
More to Come…
Man Law #56 – Understand Female Psyche 101 – A Million Reasons Why She Won’t Sleep with You; A Million Reasons Why She Just Did…
If you’ve ever asked someone to describe WHY they slept with someone else, chances are they were not 100% honest.
"I'm going to sleep with this guy...now I just need to figure out how to make it look like an accident..."
The majority of men might answer “Well, uhhhh, she was there…and it seemed like a good idea at the time.” While this might work in locker rooms and when guys get together to discuss their weekend shenanigans (not that most guys would really question WHY he slept with a girl or say anything more than “Good Job“), a woman will tend to provide lengthy doctorial-worthy explanations why she slept with someone. Her answer of “He was there…” are way to simplified and if that was the case, most women need only step outside in order to be bombarded with sexual advances. Case in point, if you sent a man and woman of relatively the same attractiveness level outside to see who could collect five phone numbers of the opposite sex fastest, 9 times out of 10, if not in every case, the woman would win.
With the exception of the following scenario where a one night stand turns into a guy who became obsessed with her and she will change her answer from “He was cute” to “It was a mistake“, most women will have a specific checklist of bullet-point matches that she has devised in order to provide plausible deniability for her actions. The key point to remember is that something about the GUY or the EVENT has to be “special”. This is the only explanation that her harshest critics (her female friends) will give her a “pass” for… Great reasons to sleep with a guy that women won’t judge THAT negatively and give a “Free Pass”:
- He was leaving the next day (or she was…)
- It was his/her birthday or some event that warranted her acting crazy
- A wedding or bachelorette party
Almost any singular “special” event that stands out, such as she was trapped in an elevator with Matthew McConaughey and one thing led to another that prevents it from seeming like just another every day situation, will give her enough credibility and plausible deniability that she is not promiscuous.
"How can I make this all seem like I hadn't planned it all from the start...Maybe having condoms on the table is a little too forward."
For those of you who maintain friendship relationships with women you have previously been romantic with or have close platonic female friends, ask her WHY she slept with someone (or you) and you will see the exclamations start running. Don’t be surprised if you receive the following for an answer, “I don’t know, but at some point during the night, I decided I was going to F*** him…” which is all the explanation most guys would ever need…
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