Man Law #76 – Kiss First, Ask Questions Later.
College is synonymous with ‘dating experimentation.’ To a certain extent, you don’t really grow out of this dating experimentation until you find someone and settle down. And by settle down, I mean marriage. I have yet to find a place with as many ample test subjects as my time in school (not counting Mardi Gras). At a big University, you can hook up with a different person each week and almost trust that their paths would NEVER cross. What better place to experiment than that?
During my freshman year of college, I was in a new place, new friends, new environment, and really had no clue what I was doing with women. Of course, I’d get lucky with a kiss or two every couple of months, but could NOT understand how guys who were no better looking and on paper seemed EXACTLY the same as myself, could not only kiss but hookup with girls consistently.
Like all good students, I consulted the experts when I ran into problems. I asked one of my buddies, a Psych major, “How he knew WHEN he should go in for the kiss”. He turned around, stared at me for a second, and said “You just know…”
And I hate to say it, but that was probably the single best piece of advice towards the opposite sex that I received during undergrad. Maybe it was the scientist in me that wanted a more detailed answer, but when it comes to people, sometimes the simplest explanation is exactly what you need to hear at the time.
Needless to say, you tend to have to build UP to the kiss so here are some signs that I tended to notice, and by no means are they exhaustive:
- Her eyes stare directly into yours – she holds eye contact.
- She holds her face close to yours – within 6 inches.
- She makes excuses to touch your body, arms/legs, or bump into you.
- She applies lip stick/gloss in your presence.
- She hugs you with her body, not the chest hug.
Now some women are naturally close talkers – they like to get real close to your face to talk. But I’ve found that if a woman has her face closer than 6 inches from yours, go in for the kiss. Don’t even think about it. Don’t doubt yourself, don’t hesitate and DEFINITELY don’t ask her. I’ve even gone in mid-sentence – BAM. Get it out of the way and revisit it before you leave. (Editorial Note: Don’t try this at work).
Don’t forget to smile as your face approaches hers. 🙂
Most women are reluctant to kiss a guy first. In fact, it’s never happened to me before where I’m just standing there, and out of nowhere found myself lip-locked with a stranger. The MOST forward approach I’ve seen from someone I started dating/seeing casually has been when she just looked at me and said “Are you going to kiss me or what!?”Women who aren’t afraid to initiate are few and far between. Its up to her to create the opportunity, and its up to US to make the first move. Own it.